Happy Mother's Day? It's Your Call!
byon 05-10-2008 at 12:35 PM (798 Views)
I hope everyone has a lovely Mother's Day, whether you're a Mom, Son or Daughter. (I think I have all the bases covered there, huh? ) May you be aware and concious of all loving energy in your life...
I love holidays of all kinds. Probably comes from having grown up without celebrating them. (I was raised Jehovah's Witness). And I notice how people respond to them. It seems that my experience is very different from many people's, because each holiday seems to bring with it specific sets of expections about what makes a "good" version, what should be done, what levels of joy or jublitation must take place...everything. There's a prebuilt definition of the "right" way to celebrate and what constitutes a successful holiday rendering.
Now, I've been a mother going on 19 years now, and I've had all manners of Mother's Day experiences. Some years I've felt disappointed and disconnected, and others, loved and appreicatied.
That didn't mean my family felt any differently towards me from one year to another, at least necessarily. Because what appears to me as the single most determining factor of my experience is my own state of mind and expectations.
This year, my daughter will wish me a happy Mother's Day, as will my husband. My SD might, and my SS probably won't, as he's off in another state stewing over some slight or another that I am clueless on. But those are his demons to battle, and it isn't really about me, anyway. Those things never can be.
Instead of looking to my kids and family for the meaning of the day, though, I look to myself now. To me, mothering is about caring and nutruring; I feel like that's an important role in my life, and I can honor that by doing some of that for myself in addition to sharing that energy with others.
So this year, that was exactly what I did! I gave myself permission to do things that made me feel good. I treated myself in many ways. Whether it was reading breaks or baths or things that smelled good or the tshirt that made me smile when I saw it, I treated myself. I was kind to myself, and made sure to make time for things that I enjoyed. Small but effective indulgences.
As a result, I'm enjoying this year's holiday a bunch, and have unofficially extended it for a few weeks...ha! I feel better for it, without the pressure on others to make that feeling for me, and as a result, the people close to me are going to feel better as well.
I don't worry so much about the little things now. To me, they don't count for much. I just want to be loving and happy. And I can think of no better way to honor the concept of Motherhood than that, anyway.
Happy Mother's Day, everyone. Hope you make yours a fabulous one!
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