*Stray Cat Rules*

Rules for Stray Cats

1. Stray cats will not be fed.

2. Stray cats will not be fed anything, except dry cat food.

3. Stray cats will not be fed anything, except dry cat food moistened
with a little milk.

4. Stray cats will not be fed anything, except dry cat food moistened
with warm milk, yummy treats and leftover fish scraps.

5. Stray cats will not be encouraged to make this house their permanent
residence.

6. Stray cats will not be petted, played with, picked up and cuddled
unnecessarily.

7. Stray cats that are petted, played with, picked up and cuddled will
absolutely not be given a name.

8. Stray cats with or without a name, will not be allowed inside the
house at any time.

9. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house, except at certain
times.

10. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house, except on days
ending in "y".

11. Stray cats allowed inside, will not be permitted to jump up on or
sharpen their claws on the furniture.

12. Stray cats will not be permitted to, jump up on or sharpen claws on
the really good furniture.

13. Stray cats will be permitted on all furniture, but must sharpen
claws on new .99 sisal-rope cat-scratching post with three perches.

14. Stray cats will answer the call of nature outdoors in the sand.

15. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the three-piece,
high-impact plastic tray filled with Fresh'n'Sweet kitty litter.

16. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the hooded litter pan,
with a three-panel privacy screen and plenty of head room.

17. Stray cats will sleep outside.

18. Stray cats will sleep in the garage.

19. Stray cats will sleep in the house.

20. Stray cats will sleep in a cardboard box lined with an old blanket.

21. Stray cats will sleep in the special Kitty-Komfort-Bed with
non-allergenic lambs wool pillow.

22. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed.

23. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed, except at the
foot.

24. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the
covers.

25. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the
covers, except at the foot.

26. Stray cats will not play on the desk.

27. Stray cats will not play on the desk, near the computer.

28. Stray cats are forbidden to walk on the computer keyboard on the
desk, when the human is asdfjjhhkl;ljfd.;oier'puyykmm4hb USING IT.

LOL! And so true! I'd add one more:

Stray cats that absolutely must remain outside shall sleep in small plastic doghouses liberally lined with pillows and cozy fleece throws.

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>^..^<
Esther

thats cute!

__________________
In the cookies of life, we are the chocolate chips.

And, all too true!

~~~Teelbee (who took a bowl of Fancy Feast out to a skinny looking stranger with tabby stripes Wednesday night -- over the feeble objections of her DH!)

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~~~Teelbee
Back to GOAL!!!
start weight: 176/goal range: 137-134/now: 138
Reached goal in Aug. 2003 - 4rd year of maintenance.

ROFL! We have had 3 stay cats during our marriage, and they all followed that progression. Clever - thanks for the laugh, and the memories. They were good friends.

And that's how "Kat" came to live at our house.

Additions to above rules:

Stray cats should not have a litter of kittens under DD's bed.

Stray cats should not have a second litter of kittens under DD's bed because she cried when she didn't get to keep one of the kittens from the first litter.

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Judy
All time highest = 180, Goal = 140, Current status = RIGHT ON TARGET!
Every single time I put food in my mouth, it matters. No more fooling myself!

Boy oh boy, that is pretty much the way a *stray*, best-est cat in the world, my favorite pet of all times...yatta, yatta,(you know the rest)...works their way into our hearts...LOL.
Thanks for sharing *stray cats*

Shelley

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~~~~
Shelley
~~~~

Visit Kassie's Korner



Life deserves a treat now and again, but life also deserves being healthy[with required disipline] to make it worth living!

*happy sigh*

Yes, we've had 2 of those and ironically both were the same "breed" (honest) and both came pre-named by a neighbor as Kitty.

One was our kitty in NZ. She was a drooler and head-butt kitty

She would also lovingly present the "best" parts of the rabbits she caught to us as gifts right outside our door...

Patches must have read these rules, as he followed the steps in just about that order

Aderyn

I love it--just sent it to my sister--could have been written by many many of my mom's pets--not just cats!

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Lori

232/190/130
My other journal http://www.lowcarbeating.com/bb/showthread.php?t=1130

You're welcome! Why is it that cats get to "rule" anyway? But I must say, we have a dog that anytime we do something that she likes, it becomes a "must do for me for evermore kind of habit!" Why is she "smarter" during those times than she is when it's something that WE want HER to learn!?

LOL @ Sharron!

We had a drooler/head-butt stray kitty when I lived at home. Thought she was just "a little off," but now that I see you have one too, it must be a kitty thing.

Her name was Ebony... she was a hoot!

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Mada
221.6/193.8 <--- ONEderland! /sz 8

I've known one other drooler/head butt-er. His name was "Trampus." Both of those cats were the most affectionate I've ever known. Kitty (1) we had to leave in NZ. She was not happy with us when we left! She was sure a sweetheart -- nicest cat we ever had!

Now we have a bunny

LOL!! I just sent this on to all my cat-loving friends!

I have a head-butt kitty - she doesn't drool though, thankfully!

Every cat I've ever owned, and that's been a few, has been a stray or brought to me by someone else. Gotta love 'em!

Char

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Veni, vidi, velcro. I came, I saw, I stuck around.

Save the Earth - it's the only planet with CHOCOLATE!