How did you know that your current partner (husband/wife/partner) was the "one"? At what moment did you realize, etc? And maybe if you're dating someone (or engaged), how/when were you sure he/she was the "one" for you??

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Carrie
156/156/135

The moment I "knew" that John was the one for me happened this way:

I was speaking on the telephone with John a few days after I met him in person (we met online once, and then met in person two days later). His then 5-year-old daughter, Abby, approached him (I could hear her say: "Daddy...")...his tone instantly softened, and he didn't hesitate to answer her and attend to her needs. I listened in awe to the short exchange they had. John's loving, quiet tones, and thoughtful answers satisfied her youthful curiosity, and she ended their encounter with a hug (he told me when we resumed our conversation).

It was then that I knew that someone who treated others so kindly, and was so generous with his time, would be "the" person for me.

Since that time nearly 5 years ago (July 19th will mark 5 years since we met), I thank God that I am married to such a gentle, kind, and generous soul. Seeing how John interacts with others -- and not just family members -- made me fall in love with him.

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April

The face of a child can say a lot -- especially the mouth part of the face.

My Blog

My husband met all my criteria, which were the following:

He had to be - intelligent, compassionate, funny

A very small list, and it took a long time to find him (but for the internet I never would have!). I never dated before I married, and in all honesty, I wasn't sure he was 'the one' - it just became very clear that there was no one else who could compete, nor could I forsee anyone coming along who would fit those criteria.

And that's the way it is to this day.

I know it sounds pretty cold-blooded, but I'm not a romantic.

Dryad

My DH and I worked at the same company. I was the HR Clerk at the time and he was a production supervisor. Whenever he would stop by my office he would tell me about his little girl, Ashley. He'd tell me what they did over the weekend or what plans he had for the coming weekend. He spent so much time with her when he had her. He was such a good Daddy to that little girl.

I had a picture of him at my desk for his anniversary with the company that I was supposed to file in his personnel file. I kept it in my "In Box" for a long time and kept looking at it. The more I listened to him and looked at his picture, I KNEW he was my future husband. I asked HIM out (he was too shy) and the rest is history!

I just had a deep feeling in my heart that he was The One whenever I would say his name, Rob. I STILL do! Even as I am writing this I still get all gooshey thinking about my DH. I am blessed.

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Suzanne (Atkins - 1/9/04)
195/168/145

ahh, such sweet stories. i got the chills. i'm glad you've all been so blessed ...
anyone else have good stories???

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Carrie
156/156/135

I met my husband 12 and half years ago in a bar in Boston (the old Molly's for those of you familiar with Allston). I hadn't dated anyone seriously in a long time, previous BF had been a major a******. Being with the ex had been so hard - he tore me down, made me feel bad and it was always such an effort to have fun with him (I think he was an alien). Anyhow, when I met the DH, we dated hot and heavy for about 6 months - and I realized that he was fun! He liked being with me - it was easy! Now that didn;t mean that we didn't argue on occasion, we did - but it wasn't often, and we never fought about stuff we couldn't reconcile. Well, after about 6 months - he decided he wanted to see other people (he had gotten cold feet) - so I let him go, after telling him he was a doofus and that I was the best thing that ever happened to him. He missed me, so we got back together - and married the next summer. I knew he was right for me because I could be myself and he loved me anyway - no games.

He is someone who is kind and gentle, no pushover, entertaining, supportive, and cleans up nice. He gets along with my friends and my family, and ultimately, shares the same outlook on life that I do. I trust him implicitly and can rely on him no matter what - he is my mainstay. Bottom line - it shouldn't be a ripping chore to be with someone you "love".

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Jen



179/179/120

My partner and I will celebrate 8 years together this year, and I feel like the luckiest person in the world.

We worked together and I loved talking to her--lots in common, great sense of humor, lots of compassion for others, and just lots of fun! There was a definite spark there, although we both were with other people at that time.

I found myself looking forward to coming to work, looking for her car in the parking lot and my heart taking that little leap when I saw it...We eventually moved to seperate cities but continued to work for the same company. We would see each other at regional events, talked on the phone often, really we became best friends.

Finally we just admitted our feelings and the rest, as they say, is history. We moved heaven and earth, and across the country to be together. We have been through illnesses and job loss, triumphs and everyday contentment. She is a precious gift for which I am thankful every single day. I can't imagine life any other way!

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Renee
1/19/04
261/220/160
41 lbs off
60 lbs to goal



Race to 199 Challenge
Labor Day Challenge: Focusing on the Journey
Personal Goal: 199 by 12/31/05

wow, such heart touching, real stories. these are very helpful testimonies, as i am struggling to make relationship decisions. i really like hearing about everyone happiness!

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Carrie
156/156/135

I think there are many possible life partners for each of us, and that long, loving, and rewarding relationships are based as much on daily decisions to be happy as they are on having found The One. As the song says, "love isn't something that you have, it's something that you do". Shift your focus from trying to find the best possible partner to trying to BE the best possible partner. BECOME the person you are hoping to find, and magical things will happen.

Sky

sage advice! thank you.

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Carrie
156/156/135

It's almost a cliche, I meet DH at church. He's a tall guy and was an acolyte at the Episcopal cathedral we attended and was always in the processions at the beginning of the services. When incense was used, he'd head the processions, swinging the censer in figure-8 loops known as "Queen Annes". He was very impressive. I saw him at an organ concert one night and went over and started to talk to him. A few weeks later, we went out and the next day I went over to my sister's house and told her I'd just been out with her future BIL the night before, barring any discoveries of him being an ax-murderer. We were engaged two months later but did have a long engagement (1 1/2 yrs.)

What really cinched the deal for me is when I took him up to meet some family that live an hour from Denver. We'd no sooner gotten to my uncle and aunt's house when I started to feel bad and throw up. As we headed back to Denver, I had to keep telling him to pull over so that I could throw up again. He dropped me off at my place and I was thinking "oh great, I'll never see him again, he's probably so disgusted ." 20 minutes later, my buzzer sounds and it's DH standing there with a six-pack of 7-Up to settle my tummy with. It pretty much says it all as to what a wonderful guy he is.

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Esther

I have to add, that R-E-S-P-E-C-T and a similar sense of humor make a relationship grow and can get you through nearly anything!

I wanted nothing to do with my now-husband when he first started asking me out. We worked for the same city government and I had to take his photo for our newsletter. Afterwards, he gave me his number and asked if I wanted to go out some time. I mumbled something to get him out of my office, and never had any intention of calling him (He had the total "bad boy" thing going on... piercings, tatoos, long-ish hair, Corvette, Harley... and I always dated professional, intellectual types) And thanks to caller I.D., I dodged his phone calls (my number was in the company directory...) for quite some time. Then he sent flowers to my work and asked if he could take me and my daughter (then 2) out for ice cream. He seemed so sweet, that I finally agreed. It still took some time for the spark to catch - on one date early on I offered to set him up with my sister since he seemed more her type. He declined. But we had fun together, and I could truly be myself, and I slowly discovered the amazing, intelligent, funny, responsible, hard-working man that he was, and eventually fell in love.

We have been married almost five years now and have a little boy to go with my daughter and his two daughters. And even though we are like night and day, I know he is the one for me (he feels like a part of me) and I thank God for his persistance in getting me to go out with him.

Staci

dh and I fell in love at first sight.
I was still in high school, he was 18 and had graduated already. We actually went to the same hs, but never met there, as I was a mere freshman the year he was a senior.
We did meet at a local video arcade. My first time there, actually. I walked into the room and he was playing pool. He was into the cowboy thing: hat, boots, western shirt, long side-burns and a mustache. He was bent over, making a shot and I glanced at him. When he looked up, with those sexy blue eyes peeking out from under the brim of his hat, I was hooked for life!
I dont recall how I managed an introduction, but we both vivedly remember the electric kiss that started out relationship!
21 years together, 19 years of marriage, 3 kids, and he still has those sexy blue eyes!!!

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Cynthia

cgilson, just make sure you follow your heart, and that you expect the best. Dont settle!

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Renee
1/19/04
261/220/160
41 lbs off
60 lbs to goal



Race to 199 Challenge
Labor Day Challenge: Focusing on the Journey
Personal Goal: 199 by 12/31/05

I met my DH at the office where I used to work. The first meeting, as he tells it, I made an impression on him. I was very short with him. He was hooked. It took a few more months for me to get interested in him. We both had bad marriages and ugly divorces. We exchanged emails and spoke on the phone a few times. I knew during our first date that it was "meant to be". He had lost his mother and I my father. We spoke about it and decided that somehow they had a hand in our getting together. He lived over an hour away and took the job that brought him to my office the same month that we met. I just knew when we decided to marry that it was right. I had absolutely no reservations or questions in my heart. We will celebrate Five Years at the end of this month. We talk often about how and why this is working and we have decided that it comes down to having the same morals and values. This is the solid foundation on which our life together is built.

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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass ...it is about learning to dance in the rain!





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