As a teacher of reading, writing, and grammr you would think there would be no issue as to wether I wanted to journal. The fact is I haven't kept a journal in years. I do feel it is important to write your thoughts, but never have gotten into the habit.

Having that said; here goes!

I am feeling good since starting this diet. I feel confident because I am seeing a change in me, both physical and emotional. Over the past few years I have began to feel quite bad about myself. I stopped wearing nice clothes, doing my hair or putting on make up. I just figured that nothing could take away the fat, so why bother.

I put on makeup yesterday and today, did my hair, and thought more about what I was wearing. (although I don't have many nice clothes in my size because I refuse to buy them).
So, after seven pounds I am feeling better. I know it is not so much the pounds as the mindset.

Where I used to feel alone in my battle with weight, I now see people having the same problems as I.
This past Thanksgiving my dad told my husband that he prayed daily that he didn't leave me because I was fat. When my husband told me that I laughed and said "thats dad for you". However, inside I think my heart crumbled a bit. My dad had spoken a fear of mine and although he meant it in a loving way, it hurt. I felt alone and somehow betrayed. Dad's and Mom's aren't suppose to think their child is fat.
I began to think about my one year old son then. I don't want him to ever know I am fat. I need to loose this weight before he understands. I want him to be proud of his mother and to be seen with his mom every day of his life.

I will do this for him, for my dad, my husband, my mom, my brothers and sister, and mostly myself!

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/236/135

Smile...it makes people wonder what you are up to!

(((Seesko)))

Good luck to you!!!! Just hang in there!! You can do this!!!

Were all here for you!!!

((hugs))


Old age ain't no place for sissies.
-Bette Davis-..
215/173.5/160
41.5 Gone
13.5 to go!!

Some of your statements mirror my own thoughts to the letter. I, too, didn't want my child to know she had a fat mom and carried this hope with me until the day she said, "Mom, you're fat!" I cried and cried and couldn't reprimand her because she was right. I've been learning that being a fat mom doesn't mean I have to be an unhealthy, sad mom. My daughter doesn't have to know that being fat feels like the end of the world, she sees me now, happier and more patient than I've ever been. Still fat, less fat than before, and living with gusto.

Good Luck to you...

Sus

450/383/200

I am having a bad day today, but I guess we all have bad days.
The weird thing is that in the past if I had a bad day on a diet, I would binge on anything and everything. I know I won't do that, but have been eating to much of the "low carb" candy.

Even though I get upset at these little set backs, I know it is still better than how I used to be. These set backs may slow down my process, but htat is o.k.

I got my husband to go walking with the kiddo and I last night. It was nice to exercise and spend time together at the same time.

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/236/135

Smile...it makes people wonder what you are up to!

I don't feel good. I ate to much today, and haven't drank enough water. I feel so yucky! It is like my body is rebelling against me for not doing as i should.

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/236/135

Smile...it makes people wonder what you are up to!

It is impossible to gain two punds over night, but that is what I did! i now it is probably water weight but AAhhhhhhh!!!!!
I really need to throw my scale out!!! It just upsets me!

My brother, who is serving in kosovo, will be coming home In February. I would love to have lost enough weight for him to be able to notice. He has been serving for a year. I will be looking to travel to Pennsylvania to see him and the rest of the family. Maybe the airline seat won't be so uncomfortable!

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/236/135

Smile...it makes people wonder what you are up to!

I'm frustrated this morning. I have been following the diet very closely this week, but haven't lost any weight. In fact I gained a pond.
I'm not going to let it get to me. I am just going to keep going. I am going to watch my calorie intake a bit more this week. Also, I didn't hit 120 ounces of water yesterday. Perhaps, I am retaining water.

My husband has lost 30 pounds since Thanksgiving. He even cheats. It makes me so mad! I happy for him, but it just isn't fair.

The scary part is I weigh more than him now! I don't like that!

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/236/135

"What my mind can envision; my body can master!"

Thanks for stopping by my journal Seesko.

Yes, I am a teacher. I teach math at a community college. This is my second year there, plus I taught one year at a university.

Don't worry too much about going up a pound. I have gained two pounds, but I know they will disappear soon enough. And actually, I have bouncing around with these few pounds since June. No real weight loss since then. Now, that's frustrating. But, I am not giving up. Started exercising again, so it will come in time.

220/142/135
7 to go!

I had a really good weekend. I ate perfectly, even started to watch my calories a bit. I walked both Saturday and Sunday, about 3 miles each day. Gabe (my son) loved riding in the stoller.

I'm starting to plan my trip home to PA this summer. I am not telling anyone at home that I am loosing weight. I hope to shockthem all. Also, hope the airplane seat is more comfortable this time.
I am excited about seeing my brother who has been serving in Kosovo for the last year.

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/237/135

"What my mind can envision; my body can master!"

I cheated on the diet today. I was having a bad couple of days and decided I needed a cheat. I actually don't feel that bad about it. I think I need a cheat day every now and then. I know others who do it.

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/237/135

"What my mind can envision; my body can master!"

I am having a very good day today. Donna noticed my weight loss, my jeans feel very loose, and my rings seem to be fitting better. I would love to weigh myself, but will try to hold out until Sunday.

I haven't worked out since Monday. It is so hard during the week. I feel so good when I work out. If it is nice tonight, I will take Gabe for a walk.

I talked to mom and dad last night. They are doing well. All the family will get together at the end of May. It will be nice.
Gabe is growing up so fast. He has been carrying around his Dorthy doll lately. He loves the Wiggles.

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/237/135

"What my mind can envision; my body can master!"

I had a great day yesterday. However, today we went to Subway and I got a wrap. I feel very full from it. I just don't feellike I am being good when i have one of those. I have already had 25 carbs today (it is only 1:17). I think I will have a low carb shake for dinner tonight.

Good luck all!!
Seesko

starting date 1/5/04

242/234/135

"What my mind can envision; my body can master!"

I walked 3 miles last night. that felt really good. I also did 100 situps. Didn't feel so good!
I have done well lowering my calories this week. I like going to fit day and seeing how I did. Yesterday I had two wraps. Yucky! I am going to cut that kind of stuff out for awhile. I think I am getting to dependent on them.

Good luck all!!
Seesko


starting date 1/5/04

242/234/135

"What my mind can envision; my body can master!"

[This message was edited by Rob on 01-24-04 at 01:08 PM.]

Hi Seesko
Just stopped in to say hi and whiel I was here anyway I fixed your valchal. I saw that you had figured out the problem but it won't fix previous posts. Yes watch those wraps and things. I have to limit myself or i end up with a laundry list of high carb substitutes.

Rob
310/233/180

Me, a skeptic? I trust you have proof.

Thanks for the help Rob!

I just got back from a 3 mile walk with the kiddo. It is very nice out here today. Probably about 80 degrees.

I ate way to much this weekend. All acceptable foods, just to much of them.

I weighed in and my weight hasn't changed since my early weigh in on Thursday. I am down 4 pounds for the week, and eight since starting.
It should be easier to take in low cal things for dinner with Mike starting 2nd shift today!

Good luck all!!
Seesko


starting date 1/5/04

242/234/135

"What my mind can envision; my body can master!"