actually it shows that I joined a while ago,but somehow lost where this place was..sorry...lol..so Iam here to introduce myself...

so Iam new...and very tired...Iam a 33yr old mother of 2 boys ages 9,and 8,and also married my junior high school sweetheart,and pain in the butt,been married now for 12yrs,and still doing well thanks to long work hours!!..(sorry I like to make jokes,but I love him dearly)...We live in a small town in Alberta Canada, wich is right up along the rockies it is very beautiful here,but not where I grew up...so doesnt feel home not even after 12yrs!!...

anyways....as I was saying Im new and Im tired...Im tired just like Im sure alot of you were,Im tirred of my weight...not only for the phsyical asspects but for the emotional asspects,infact more for the emotional part...I sometimes feel like I have been dragged and beaten,and so I come here,dirty,swollen,bruised and yup,you bet...tired...lol...I have tried low carb once before but used it more as a lose weight fast scheme,and it worked,but then the weight comes back....and so now I have been loseing the same 30pds every year,no wait,2-3 times a year...and it drives me crazy!! not only that,I just feel been here done that...so I started doing low carb about a month and a half ago,maybe two months and Iam down 22pds!!! So that does feel awesome but like I said it is so hard to be happy about the cycle,gain,lose,gain,and lose again...and I really wont celebrate until I reach past the 30pd mark...I just cant...you know you get to the point when you just say,I cant get excited in case I fail again...I know,you can never fail at what you never give up on...

I dont know why,but also this time feels diffrent...I use to go on a diet so I could lose weight for a special occasion,or holidays,or family visits...anything,and I would set out what I thought was a realistic plan,you know,lose 50pds in 3m,that plan!!and when I didnt do well or even close to doing well,I gave up,and like a spoiled kid went straight back to my cake and ice cream and had one big heck of a pitty party!!!...had a few of those...but this time,I dont know,maybe I just feel done..."DONE"...I dont want to look in the mirror,I dont want to weigh myself,I dont want to do anything like that,I just want this off...yes I do weigh myself once a week instead of 87 times a week...I want to feel good about myself,I want to enjoy my life,I want to walk past people with out thinking dang I didnt adjust myself...every time I get up I feel like I have to adjust my top so it covers my butt....???? how does that hide it?? anyways...so yes this time feels diffrent,I have no set time,but Im trying to educate myself more,and cook more...I still give myself a bit of a cheat day,and have ice cream...yes sorry,but Im working on that...baby steps,and during the week,nothing...but Iam enjoying eating...and Im not starving...so that is diffrent every diet I went on I was starving,and no wonder it never worked....Im just happy and sad all in one,happy that I feel like this time I can do it,and that I have lost already and Iam wearing a pair of my black santana jeans that were really tight on me and arre now loose...and sad,sad because I feel like I have such along way to go,and sad because I have been here and done this before..I just want a better life for not only me but for my kids,they deserve a mom who can play with them,not snap at them because she saw someone skinnier than her or because she saw a glance in a mirror,anything can set me off and Im just tired of it..
SO sorry this is sooo long...just to end this,Iam 5'9 and now weigh 223,wich is better than the 245!!!....
I love the recipies,but its going to take me a bit to get use to this board,and look around...but just wanted to say hi....it feels good to get things out in the open,and no more hiding....I can do this right????I just need help...(*sigh*)
just feel overwhelmed...I want to lose another 60pds!!...but would be happy with 50 more gone...
thanks for listening...

Hey Lannae,
welcome! I'm sure you'll find lots of support here. We are all in this together, and it really is easier that way! thanks for sharing about yourself. I had to laugh at the adjusting the shirt and then "how's that going to hide it?" I think we've all been there in one way or another. I have a million "over the butt" shirts!
I know it is overwhelming when you think about the total number, but you've already done so well! And as you said, baby steps. You say you want to lose 60. You've lost 22. You have lost 1/4 of it! that's great! You said you are educating yourself, that's power!!! the more you know, the more control you have! Be sure you have read the book for whatever plan you are doing, and definitely ask questions, vent, cheer for yourself, share, read, and challenge yourself and others here. It's a great place to be, and we're glad to have you!!!

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Heather

lannae,
Welcome to LCE. I would just like to say, you CAN make it work this time...and forever!
You need to make it your WOLF...Way of Living Forever. Low carb is not a diet that you can go on and off of...which you have discovered. Many of us have fallen, and many of us return to *try again*, but true success comes in never giving up, continuing on despite the odds, and the most important thing...changing your mindset.

Good luck...you CAN do it. Read your book for your plan, come here for support and encouragement, incorporate some exercise, drink your water, eat your veggies...LOL...well, you get the picture!

Let us know how it's going.

Shelley

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Shelley


Visit Kassie's Korner


"A goal without a plan is just a wish."
--Antoine de Saint Exupery

I’m SOONER born,
And SOONER bred,
And when I die,
I’ll be SOONER dead!
GO SOONERS!
I be ready for some football!

One little walker-runner Dude for every 10 miles!

lannae-welcome.

it seems you have already discovered one of the biggest secrets for success: don't stop doing what is working for you! low carb is most DEFINITELY something that has to be a permanent change in your life if you want the results to be permanent.

it does sound like, from your post, this is a very charged issue for you and is creating some considerable stress. if that is the case, you may want to consider seeking professional support in the form of a counselor to help you along the way as well. certainly an option.

i would also encouarge you to check the the dr. phil book on the 7 keys to weight loss success, even if you're not especially a dr. phil fan. he has LOTS of good info regarding the psych aspects of being overweight. i'd been overweight more or less all my life, and they sure rang true for me.

good luck to you.

__________________

I know I am repeating what has already been said, but the key to this is to make low carb, whichever plan you are on, a permenant lifestyle.

As said in DANDR, a diet is not a bus: you can't just get on and off and expect permenant results. I know it is hard to imagine keeping up the lifestyle at the begining, but many of us here have been doing this for years, without stop. That is one of the true keys to making low carb work.

__________________
Started Atkins on 9/20/03
235-->190; 150 goal

Lannae - Welcome! We're looking forward to getting to know you. I know it can be challenging to stay the course on the maintenance - we're here for you.

__________________
~~~Teelbee
Back to GOAL!!!
start weight: 176/goal range: 137-134/now: 138
Reached goal in Aug. 2003 - 4rd year of maintenance.

Hi, Lannae. I hear your frustration...and also a sense of renewed commitment to yourself. Good advice so far...hope you'll keep this spot bookmarked and come back every day.

You can read my success (and failure) story on this site. You'll see a lot of ups and downs. Low-carb is finally giving me a lifestyle I can live with--but it takes months--or years--to get educated and comfortable with it. So be patient. Read a lot. Stick around here. Stay the course.

Best wishes!

__________________
Barb L.
Atkins since Jan 2003
Maintenance as of 4/05


My Fitday Journal

I first off want to say thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for the warm welcome and advice...

I think that is it,Im not looking at this as a quick scheme diet anymore,I have done that my whole life...and it does not work,the faster it came off the quicker it came back..and I can not keep doing that emotional trip anymore...do I need counselling like suggested,who knows maybe,but right now,I think I need to just get more realistic and real about my future my goals and who Iam....and I think that is what has hit me,and now I feel a sort of a shedding of my outer layer...if that makes sense...but just a feeling of starting fresh...

I have the atkins book and have read that and I also bought the southbeach,but prefer the atkins.I keep the copy by my bed side and refer to it just until I feel more comfortable and then also trying some recipies from here..its been good..and also just reading labels and learning about the fibers in foods,but to be honest forgot about some of the sugars...so was reading a bit about that,and it is shocking...but for once Im saying do I want this stuff in my body,instead of what will make me lose weight the fastest...its not about that anymore...Im going to keep going and if I fall,its not the end,this is about me and my life...sorry for being corny,but I just feel more positive about this than I have about anything in a long time...

Im really,really glad I found this place and started to snoop around...thank you so much...I look forward to sharing who Iam with all of you,and learning about myself along the way,and also getting to know all of you...thanks!!!

Hi Lannae..
I've been reading your posts.and I can really identify with what you are saying. All my life I've done this diet or that diet...lost the weight, gained it back (& more)...felt good about myself when I'm thin and bad when I'm fat...the whole chunk of "stuff" that comes with this battle against our own demons! Like you, this time it's different...I can't really explain it but this time I am ready to get off the roller coaster and learn to be healthy...body, mind, and soul.

Welcome to the forum and I'm looking forward to know you better along the way of this journey

vickie

lannae- glad to hear you're feeling on-track!

and please do understand that i wasn't trying to make a personal comment about you when i suggested you be aware of the option of counseling. it's simply been my experience that the more completely we take care of ourselves and the better we're feeling, the easier it is to stay successful-on eating plans, and in every aspect of life! since my background is in mental health, anytime someone seems significantly distressed, i'm usually the first person who's asking if they've considered counseling! there are times folks take it as a personal critisism, but it's never meant that way. it's just that life can be challenging! having whatever support you decide you need is a great boon. like everything else, you know best what you need. and it sounds to me like you're feeling better and more in control already. that's great!

you also know most of us understand exactly the mental shift you're making here, right? there are probably few if any folks around here who haven't been with you at some point: always looking for the quick fix. heck, low-carb is very tempting that way, since you often lose quite quickly in the beginning. but as you've discovered, it's the mindset that must change, more than anything. now that you're making that shift...well, that's what's going to get you there.

keep us posted and let us know how you're doing. this is a good place for support and i've found my participation here has really helped me as much as it could possibly have helped anyone else.

peace out.

__________________

thanks again for the support!!

Vickie~your right I do feel awesome when Iam thinner,but at the same time,because I have usually been so restricting and starving on the diet that got me thin,it doesnt last...and for some reason I know the weight is comming back so I feel good,but yet there is a gloom...but this time,yes it just feels right,dont get me wrong,its hard,and its also a feeling of almost being humble,and a realization that if I really want this to stick,then I have to do it right,and I have to do it in a way that Im comfortable and not in for the quick fix...Im glad you understand!!

Godess~dont you worry,it takes alot for me to take things personally,but when you wrote that,it made me feel maybe I should...and it is a good suggestion...and I do have good days and bad days..but its more for the fact that the road feels long,and learning all this new way of life can be overwhelming and like I said to vickie,its a humble moment...posting and opening my darkest secrets...I use to make a plan to go up town around lunch time and do my arrends then I would make a plan to go to D.Q and order a big meal plus myice cream,on a regular bases...or go and buy a carton of ice cream and come home and eat that...and it made me excited...and I think that is what has been hard,to admit what I use to do,and trying to come to terms with the why I did it,and trying to get over it,I was abusing myself...and now Im having to learn to cope with my boredom,anger,fustration,and sadness...and you know what,it bites sometimes!!! lol!!! Sometimes I would much rather drown myself in the ice cream than to face myself...but its slowly comming and turning into something positive...Im actually learning to be proud of myself,and to really think,and treat myself better,and hug my husband with out thinking should I suck in my stomach!!

everything in time...Im here to learn,Im here to listen,and Im just here...

BIG THANKS!!!it feels good to know that Iam really part of the human race,wow!!