Ok, so it happened. Things were going along swimmingly, you were on top of the world and it was all falling effortlessly in to place when suddenly, there it was: temptation, smacking you in the face! You weren’t ready for it, and the timing couldn’t have been worse. It’s been a rough week: the boss yelled at you. Or you got a ticket. Or you had a fight with your spouse.
You found yourself longingly wishing for some sugar-dipped comfort, and you reached for the snack tray. Whatever was on it, you snarfed it down, barely even tasting it, and followed it with three more. And now, you’re feeling crummy.
Well, read on friend, and find out how to make this slip actually work for you!
Tell yourself right now—You are NOT a failure, and you have not “blown” anything. So cancel the pity party and get back on track immediately. There’s only one road to failure—giving up permanently. As long as you're working on improving your health, your life, yourself, you ARE a success. Don’t make meaningless, arbitrary declarations that the day, week, month or more are “blown!” That’s just silly. What you ate this morning doesn’t impact the nutritional value of what you eat this afternoon. It’s a journey, man. Your eating habits did not develop overnight. You won't change them overnight. But you can make some great progress if you keep on plugging, no matter what. (And besides, when you’re feeling crummy about what you’re eating, how much do you enjoy it anyway? You know it’s no fun to eat crap you feel guilty about eating. Just keep on going.)
- Telling yourself repeatedly that you "can't pass up" your edible nemesis translates into believing you can't pass it up, which translates into that “can’t” becoming your personal reality...You got to believe it's possible, Hon, or at least see the potential. Otherwise, you're setting yourself up with a self-fulfilling prophecy. There were no cookie-pushing terrorists in the break room. You made a choice, not succumbed to an inevitable reality. Take responsibility—it hurts a little, maybe, but it actually hurts a lot less than feeling helpless.
Recognize that eating off-plan does not mean you're weak. (It means you're human.) Watch that self-talk! If you eat low-carb long enough, you're probably gonna eat off-plan at some point. The trick isn’t to never do it, but rather to minimize it and hop right back on track. For most people, eating off-plan is followed by self-recrimination and depression. Guess what? Those negative thoughts and feelings sabotage your efforts way more than the food you just popped in your mouth! Feeling bad is fattening! So don’t even go there, girlfriend. (Or guy-friend, as the case may be.)
- When you do eat off-plan, decide to use the experience constructively! That’s right: Make it work for you! Use it as an opportunity to learn. Ask yourself questions—what factors played a role in the choice to stray? How can you find ways to support yourself more make it easier for yourself in the future? Note how you feel physically. Note how you feel emotionally. Rate the level of satisfaction you got from that those brownies. Do a mental cost/benefit analysis...there's a real good bet that it wasn't worth it. Take notes to refer back to if you think it might help. You can be armed with that knowledge next time you feel tempted to stray.
- Smart is prepared! Set yourself up for success. Know your toughest challenges, and have a plan to address them. Use your recent experience to formulate your personalized “anti-stray” plan. Maybe you’ll decide to have better-choice foods ready. If weekends tend to be a hard time for you, then decide what might make it easier. What if you had your meals and snacks planned out ahead of time? What if you had some engaging activities planned for yourself to treat yourself with, instead of “treats” that end up costing you? You get the idea.
Use the experience to better know thyself. There’s an old Chinese proverb: “No disease, short life. One disease, long life.” In other words, the people who know themselves and their weak spots can act accordingly. But if you don't identify and acknowledge those issues, they come back and bite you in the (growing?) behind! Know what your disease is! A poor choice (or several poor choices, for that matter) is an excellent way to “diagnose your disease.” You know what triggers you now, so what can you do next time to support your success?
- Use the experience as a wake-up call that you need to better care for yourself. That’s right: It’s not time for punishment and self-denigration! Think mood management & minimizing stress. If you keep yourself built up and happy, it’s easier to make good decisions. Find lots of (non-caloric) ways to be good to yourself and unwind. Indulge in some self-care and you won’t need to indulge with that sugar-laden garbage!
- Be your own best friend! The last time you wandered off-course, what was all that negative, disappointed, angry, and generally disgusted accusations you hurled at yourself? Now back up a minute, and imagine instead of slipping up yourself, a good friend called you with the exact same story. Would you tell your friend she was a complete hopeless failure, or a weak, stupid screw-up, or disgusting and ugly? Would you say ANY of the stuff you said to yourself? Would you—even secretly—believe any of that about her? More likely, wouldn’t you encourage her to forgive herself and support her getting back on track? It’s sad sometimes how mean we can be to ourselves. If we had people in our lives that treated us anything remotely like the way we sometimes treat ourselves, we'd dump 'em in a heartbeat! (And we’d be right.)
- Visualize it, baby! Visualize it. Replay the scene in your mind, but instead of using it as a starting point for a self-directed diatribe, how about changing the ending? Get a clear mental picture of what success is to you. What might you do differently? What does it feel like? How does the story end? Use this to change not only your perception of this situation, but to prepare you for the next one. Let yourself drift into a similar daydream whenever you’re feeling tempted, to provide motivation and support. The more you see yourself succeeding, the more real it becomes to you and the more you do succeed.
Take time, right now, to acknowledge your success and appreciate yourself! Sound odd? After a slip is exactly when you most need to acknowledge your success! We tend to beat ourselves up for slipping, but cavalierly ignore or dismiss the million-and-one-times we don't slip, whether we pass a milestone or simply have a good day. We use a slip as “proof” we don’t have what it takes, but ignore overwhelming evidence that we actually do have the right stuff. Consider setting aside a specific few minutes of everyday to simply focus on what you've done right, no negativity allowed! When you're feeling strong and good about yourself, temptations are way less tempting!
There is no failure, unless you decide there is. It’s all up to you man. Use that slip as success insurance and move on and you’ll get where you want to go. You are making it work for you! You’ll feel better along the way, too. That’s the point, anyway.